D-Day: Thoughts on the day

July 2nd 2012

Today is my official (doctor issued) due date. It is just another day for others but for me I feel different, not because anything has occurred or I am somewhere different, its just because it feels like something should be happening and its not. My husband got up and left to work as usual, we've had breakfast and watched the weather as usual and now we are getting ready to step out and play. I will see the doc this afternoon and probably return home for a nap. But this day marks something important, it marks a moment where the past and future seem to exist simultaneously, its certainly a trying time for women in their pregnancy because many don't deal with anxiety of the unknown well, many may be uncomfortable and tired, but its best to try to reflect on the last 280 days and realize the magnitude of the new journey one is about to embark on. Eat something good, enjoy a nice bath I suppose and just be. It's hard not to feel sad but its even harder to understand the sadness, the baby is still thriving, she will be here soon and demanding all attention so I see this kind of as a marker for the mental adjustment one needs to really grasp, fully, the larger picture of this time, beyond the first real contractions, beyond the labor, beyond the first's and onto the in between days..the everyday, the normal, when all the novelty is worn and you need still make the little one feel special and be made to feel special as well.

p.s. was still hoping for a relaxing July 4th with my summer cocktail..but this is slowly fading away by the minute..