Portrait of a Mother: Part II

A few months ago, I began to write about and work through my feelings about being a mother to a little girl and also the realization that I would soon be a mother to two little girls in a post called 'Portrait of a Mother', I was 26 weeks pregnant at the time. In hindsight, I could have never fully understood what it is to have these two children until it actually happened, and today, a typical Wednesday morning, is not at all 'typical' for me. My mind is slowly realizing that I am in fact a mother of these two precious little ones; its been two weeks since Evalie was born but today is my first day without the support of many nurses and doctors, my mom, sisters and brother, I have no guests, play dates scheduled..and my husband is gone. (he's back to work today!). I am truly and solely responsible for them, they will depend on me for everything (one, more so than the other). I think the biggest pressure I feel right now is to not make Arielle feel like she isn't getting any attention, but also to balance the time that I spend with Evalie because I have waited so long for theses moments and they are fleeting, I want the opportunity to savor them. I want to be able to play with Arielle, cuddle with her and also have time to cuddle my little bundle while she still fits nicely in between my bosom and my palm. Its a challenge, a nice one, the one I've chosen for myself. 

I may look tired and not so fashionable for now but its these times we will look back on and miss dearly, I want to be able to look back fondly and be thankful that I took the time off to be with my babies. 

1 Week Old

We arrived home on Friday as a family of four; a bit tired, excited, nervous and really happy. The idea that we have finally gone through the birth of a beautiful little girl (..long story to come) without any casualties and now return home makes it all even more real. I have spent hours just watching her sleep, observing her moves, smelling her head, holding her little hands and feet, and I love every moment of it. The love one can develop for a baby is not always instant, although it was for me and it is very overwhelming, its almost too hard to comprehend how much affection you can develop in a few minutes, hours, days of meeting a little person.

My family came by on Friday afternoon a few hours after we got home and have been here on and off since; mom and my sisters have been making us delicious meals, cleaning, doing laundry, playing, laughing and really just making this time so special for us. I have not had a chance to dwell on anything or even let the hormonal shifts get me down, there hasn't really been a spare moment. Mom has also been here every night bathing the kids and getting in some cuddle time after work. 

Evalie had a 1 week checkup with the pediatrician and it turns out she's perfect, she has grown half an inch in a week and has gained 6 ounces as well. She nurses quite well and has virtually put herself on her own schedule, its made it quite easy for us to get rest and manage two kids (especially with one who has had strep all week). She's really good, quiet little girl, we sometimes forget she's here, she only cries during her bath otherwise she's quiet or making little sounds to let us know she's up.

She smiles quite a lot and I would argue they are real smiles but others think its gas..either way, its really pretty when she does. We have blown through a entire pack of newborn diapers and generated a lot of laundry! in the midst of all this, I still remain slightly in disbelief of the intensity of the last few days and hours leading to her birth, I am amazed at the strength of my baby and myself, the commitment and support of my husband, mother and sister and the determination of my doctors and nurses. 

What's in a name?

Evalie Anaïs

Origin of the name Evalie:

Life. A form of Eve.

Evalie \Evaly\ as a girl's name is pronounced EH-və-lee

It is of Hebrew origin. Evalie is a variant of Evelyn.

Origin of the name Anaïs:

Gracious, full of grace.

Anais \a-nais\ as a girl's name is pronounced ah-NAH-eece.

It is of French and Hebrew origin. Anaïs is a variant of Ana.

Notes on a second

Having not only a second child but also a daughter, for me has been rather amazing, there is no repetition, it is not even a known feeling, its all a novel experience, she is all new, her smell, her little sounds, her features, her demeanor, they are all her own and so beautiful. She is perfect in every way, everything I could have hoped for, filled with love, curiosity, a kind of innocence that never can be regained. Its all so amazing and much to absorb and there's nothing else like it even after a having a first child. I am in absolute awe of this little baby girl and although she's rather quiet, she already has captured spots in the hearts of her family especially her big sister.